Confronted by my classmate today.

He tried to trick me into agreeing to Friday's lesson being changed to Mondays instead of the Thursday's one - I've mentioned this before.

He stooped that low to "try" to trick me! I asked him if it's an unanamous vote. He said that when *I* wanted the Thursday's changed, I wanted a majority vote. This is totally untrue. I DID NOT suggest it. It was the lecturer's decision to make it unanamous. I mean, yes, I wasn't too happy about it being unanamous, but I respected her decision. And now, he's saying that I didn't, and that now most of my other classmates (supposedly) agree to his idea rather than mine, that I'm changing my opinion 'coz I'm not getting it my way. BULLSHIT!

I haven't heard a peep from anyone else about Friday. But apparently, all of them agreed, which again, is total BULLSHIT. "Most of them" didn't agree to it. They didn't mind it. That's different. They also didn't mind Thursday.

So anyway, the whole "conversation" was back and forth, back and forth. He kept asking me if I agreed. I told him that I didn't agree to it, but it didn't really matter right? He was going to go on ahead and change it anyways. But no, he kept pressing for a go ahead. Then I realised, it wasn't a majority vote. He was avoiding that part the whole time. He made me think it was a majority vote the whole time - fucker.

So yes, it is an unanamous vote. And he can't do a fucking thing without my consent. Ha! I love this kinda power.

Then he stooped even lower and called me 'selfish'. And this made me think - was I really?

Hear me out. I have to wake up early on Thursdays, and go for the 8am class. 2 hours later, I don't have any other classes till 1pm. So that's a 3 hour break. So I wake up early, then have to wait. Wtf!?

They want Fridays off to have a long weekend. Isn't that more selfish?? I mean, I've been almost debarred before. And if I keep coming in late on Thursday mornings, I'd get debarred again. Yes, I could wake up earlier. But hey, they don't have to too if they change Thursday's class to Monday right? So give up long weekend and wake up later on Thursdays. Isn't that better?

So far, the people I've asked about this (outside from class), totally agree with me. Not 'coz I'm their friend, but everyone would rather come to school on Fridays at 1pm than on Thursdays at 8am. That's why I don't understand why these people would rather otherwise. No, I'm not trying to sound like a brat and want everything *my* way. People who know me, know that I'm not like that. I don't always have to have things done *my* way, and I'm fine with that. But it's just, I seriously think Thursday's change is the most sensible one. C'mon, really.

Argh, whatever. He asked me to think about it while I walked away. Pfft, yea sure, I've thought about it. And I'm sticking to my decision. Selfish or not.

High.. High on alcohol. Shit. And I have class at 8am later on. Shit.

I'm so fucking tired, it's not even describable. And I have the hiccups. Great.

FUCKING BITCHES!!

I'm getting bullshit from both coursemates AND lecturers.

My updated timetable says that I have a 2 hour practical at 8am on Thursdays. And the best way to avoid that, is to move it to 10am on Mondays. But Nooo... My classmates from that class, wanna move Friday's 1pm practical to Monday at 10am instead. Just 'coz they want Friday off. I totally understand if they want Fridays off - 'coz I'd have Fridays off too. But they don't get it. The whole point of moving Thursday's 8am class, is 'coz it's at 8AM!!! I'd rather come to school for 2 hours on Fridays, rather than come to school EARLY on Thursdays. 8am y'know?? And after that 8am class, I'd have a 3 hour break before my next class, while THOSE people, have another class to attend from 10-12. Fuckers.

C'mon, do you get what I'm saying here?? 8am class on Thursdays? Or 1-3pm class on Fridays?? The answer is obvious.

Plus!! I'm not sure if our lecturer agreed to their new idea, but she did agree to Thursday's class being moved. So now, the two guys who approached me with this new "idea" are pissed with me. Rrright, make me the bad guy.

*mutter mutter*

I'm dead. D-E-A-D - DEAD!

IPD sucks. Wtf *is* IPD?? Seriously, Yh, I don't know how you guys managed to pass the damn thing. I have Syaz's presentation slides with me, briefing was today, and I don't get a thing. What are we supposed to find out? Don't they have, like, a template or something? I'm really clueless here. Argh, I hate school.

As I finished the last book of the trilogy, I heard sirens. As if the ending had come to life. I hate sad endings.

The school library had actually gotten the 2nd and 3rd part of Nan McCarthy's trilogy pocket book series. I was the one who requested for them last semester. I was surprised to find them on the shelves on the first day of school. I would've thought they'd take my request and chuck it aside. The librarian must've read the first book after seeing how enthusiastic I was to ask for the next edition.

The ending was unexpected. I expected a happy ending. Sad, really. I really wanted a happy ending.

I love the way Nan McCarthy wrote this book. It's as if she was an expert with internet acronyms and accents. She really brought it to life. I could really read it, like how the characters would've read it. Awesome.

I didn't think the 3rd book was as good as the first. Maybe the ending caught me off guard. Or maybe, just maybe, the first was really alot better. The 2nd book was so-so. It did make me wonder what may have happened next. And I guess that proved it's purpose. I made myself read the 3rd book before taking a nap.

I feel as though I'm writing as if Nan McCarthy's writing this. I feel her style in me. I guess I'm just like that. Influential. I feel like the writer whenever I finish a good book, and this is just a prime example of that.

I hate the way I write these days. Especially on my blog. I feel totally inadequate when I read other people's blogs then read mine. As though my writing sucks. It does, from time to time. I guess it's the inspiration that comes from these good books that makes me write better. I really should read more. Though I know I'm going to be too lazy to read any. We'll see I guess..

So I'm finally home, after a retarded day of school.

No, I wasn't late - today, in fact, I was pretty darn early. Class was at one, and I reached school at 12pm. I went straight to the department office to get my timetable checked out. 'Coz I've recently discovered that it's been changed. So no, no more nice timetable that I so loved so so very much. Now it's totally screwed. I start classes at 8 on thursdays. Which means, no clubbing - great.

I tried to change is, but the office doesn't allow it till I speak to my lecturer, which I did, and she doesn't mind the idea. In fact, she'd rather it be changed back to Mondays from 10 to 12, than 8am on Thursdays. I was relieved, but then it had to be approved by the rest of the class as well. And when no one objected, I started to smile inside. This I did, till one of 'em said he was going to be adding new modules to his timetable and thus Monday might not be possible. Bastard.

But no worries, I've checked Syaz's timetable and the timeslot available for his appealing modules will not clash with the 10am class on Monday, so hopefully, he'd agree to it, and the Thursday class will shift back to Mondays. I'll just cross my fingers - just in case.

My timetable's really screwed up now, really. Now, most of my classes will start from 1pm onwards, 'cept on Wednesdays. And no, I can't add in any more modules, 'coz my course department head won't allow it. He even removed one module from my original timetable - WLT. So basically, what I'm trying to say is that, I won't be graduating in 3 years. I'd be staying back for another semester.

So next semester, I'd be doing my attachement. And after that, while everyone celebrates graduation, I'd be doing 2 more modules. Shit. I should've gone for summer school. 'Coz if I did, I wouldn't need another semester. It would mean, I would and could graduate in 3 years. But noooo, the guy on the phone who told me about summer school, left out this very important detail. If he didn't, I would've gone for summer school, and I would graduate on time. Dumbass.

So now the hard part. How do I tell my dad?

When I got up for Church, my mom told me that my dad, sis and herself were leaving already. I mean, okay, I purposely got home this morning so that I can go to Church today, and I woke up already, and now they're going to go without me?? Fuck. So I just told her to wait. She didn't want to, but my dad knew my situation, so they waited. I mean, my mom can't go anywhere, 'coz my dad's the one who drives. So I quickly washed up, changed and we left in 10 mins, still having time to spare to drive to Church.

At Church, we were just in time for service. My mom couldn't complain. But unfortunately for me, today's topic for sermon was "Adultry". Great. It so doesn't apply to me. But not intentionally, I couldn't keep awake. So I fell asleep, many, many, many many times. I think the Pastor(the head pastor) saw me, and after sermon, she shook hands with some people, one of them - my dad. After shaking hands with him, she looked at me and smiled with this I-know look. Damnit.

She's gonna condemn me. I know it.

So when we got back from Church, I went straight to bed. My parents tried to wake me up to go to my grandma's (which I wanted to do), but I was too tired, so I slept till 6pm. Got up for 'The Gilmore Girls', ate Chicken rice, then went back to sleep. I just got up 'coz I heard my handphone vibrate on my table.

It was Sid, she wanted to stay over. But 'coz she called too late, my parents didn't allow. Plus, school starts tomorrow.

Damn, school starts tomorrow - what a bummer. I feel like it's a sentence. This is the work of the Pastor's. Condemning me already. This is my punishment for sleeping in Church. But really, I don't get it. On the 7th day (says the bible), it's supposed to be the day of rest. So why are we obliged to go the Church. To wake up early in the morning and go to Church. Don't get me wrong. It's not a big obligation to me, I choose to go. It's just, does it have to be so damn early? So I shouldn't be punished for sleeping during sermon right? It is, afterall, the day of rest - and in this context, I was actually obeying the bible. So hey, I can't get punished for that right? Right? Argh damn, forget it.

The MANGO sale rocked! I got a few tops, and a skirt. Total cost: $75.

I went super early. Okay, 11am, but only 'coz I was delayed picking up my pay check. But the Centrepoint branch was like a "normal walk-in" kinda crowd. No one was being kiasu and trying to scramble for their choice cuts. Everyone there was cool and calm. And it really made the shopping alot easier.

I did go by the TAKA outlet AND the Wisma outlet to check if I could pick up anything else, but it was crazy I tell you. Packed to the max, and everyone was so rude - pushing and snatching clothes off the racks. It's insane.

Sometimes I think all these people belong to the Pasar Malam, really. C'mon, if everyone was cool and calm about the whole situation, everyone will get their chance to buy what they wanna buy. And if there's no stock, it's just not meant to be la. Really, do they need to resort to this kinda ugly behaviour? *sigh*

Ben and Gek Puay celebrated their birthdays today. HAPPY BIRTHDAY GUYS!!

Technically, Ben's birthday was on the 25th, and GP's on the 30th. And Sara and Diana baked a brownie for them - as a birthday cake. Sweet huh? What's even better is their presents we bought for them. For Ben, we got a '9-ball' lighter. It's more of a novelty item rather than something practical - just for the fun of it. And for GP, a funky belly stud. It's really cool I tell you.

Both the big 2-0 now. Sigh, it's sad to think mine wouldn't be too far behind. Take note folks - 4th Dec. I suddenly feel so old.

MANGO sale starts today.

Funny thing happened today. Sara, Diana and I were at Lido Macs (as usual), when I spotted 2 guys fighting outside of MANGO. Funny shit I tell you. One of 'em tried to swing a punch, but slipped on his own feet and fell. Haha, poor stupid bastard.

My friend just informed me that Mike Shinoda was in Zouk on Wednesday. He said that his friend(girl) met him and chatted up with him that night, and he even gave her his LA number. WTF???!!!

Lucky lucky girl..

Where was I when all these things happen?? First, last week's wed - Edison Chen, this wed - Mike Shinoda. Good gawd...

Apparently, he was in Zouk the whole time. And of all the Wednesdays to avoid Zouk and stay in Phuture the whole night. Gawd damnit.

Don't ever get a facial. It hurts like hell, and now my face is dotty.

EXPRESSIONS was a scam. They said in the papers that the facial was only $48. But they didn't tell you the whole story. Turns out, they only give you hald a facial. Meaning, no steaming of the face, and no blackhead/whitehead removal. So it kinda defeated the purpose of me getting one. The whole facial, including steam and removal, cost $131.50. Wtf right? So the lady recommended me another place just next door, so I tried that.

This place, didn't use the steamer. Instead, they used some "ioniser". Whatever that is. Basically it massages the skin to make the removal easier and less painful. LIARS. It hurt like crap! And now I've got red dots all over my face. Gawd... $88 down the drain. And all I wanted was ONE blackhead to be removed. That's it! But noo...

I was contemplating whether or not to even go clubbing tonight, since I didn't look my best. But I went anyway. Today was not bad. Still squeezy, but I got to see Rongyan aka Chelsey and Jenn. Bumped into a couple of my other friends there too.

Rongyan, Tim (from school), and I went to Alazthar to eat after. The cheese prata couldn't beat Alameen's. But the lychee drink was not bad, tho it also could be 'coz I was thirsty like hell. I drank mine finished even before the food came. Then I finished Rongyan's one with my prata. She didn't like it as much, so she ordered another drink. Didn't matter to me. I was happy to finish it.

I found $30! It was fucking funny I tell you. Rongyan and I were dancing right next to this couple who couldn't stop smooching. So at one time when they were somewhat dancing, I noticed something dropped on the floor. I looked down, and picked them up. I thought it was mine, so I began to put it into my pocket. Realising it was money, I wanted to see how much I dropped. But when I felt my pocket, my money was still there! So of course I straight away knew it was the guy's money. I just quietly continued putting it into my pocket. What?? The bugger and his (hopefully) girlfriend were taking to much space and kept on bumping into rongyan and I. So hey, if he wanted more space in exchange for money, I don't mind mann... Rongyan and I shared a beer at wine bar after that. It tasted so sweet.

I so need new clothes. I think I've only got enough clothes to last a week. That's so not good esp when I'm going to start school soon. Hopefully I can find stuff at the Mango sale coming up. And I hope I don't have to spend so much for new clothes. I'm really damn broke. Esp after the facial, fuck, die la die la.

People always come into the shop when I'm having my lunch. It's as if there's a sign outside saying "Please..come in. Amanda's having her lunch." I couldn't fully enjoy my MOS burger ebi(prawns), tho I did notice that it tasted extra yummy today. 5 is just not enough. Give me 2 dozen!! I so need the recipe.

That was lunch. Guess what I ate for dinner? EBI!! Mann, it was goood.

If it didn't cost $3.##, I'd buy everything they had. Hell, I'd buy MOS burger, 'coz everything there tastes heavenly.

Tomorrow I'd be going for my first ever facial. What for? Well, 1. I've always wanted to try it out. 2. I have this embedded blackhead on my nose that I can't get out. 3. ... ... There's no #3. #1 and #2 explained it all.

I saw this funky PUMA bag today. A customer was carrying it. It's so darhling. But I can't quite say the same about the woman carrying it. She wasn't that big-sized, but her ass was twice mine! LITERALLY. I'm not exaggerating one bit. On the other hand, I hate the size of my ass. It should be a little smaller. Sigh, sad.

This last week of the holidays would be quite a rush for me. I have so many errands to run before school re-opens on Monday. Gawd, just hope I'll get everything done in time. *crosses fingers*

I wish I were rich.

Y'know, my bro directed my dad to drive up to his friend's place the other day, to show us their house. It was at night, and being half-blind and all, I could hardly see. But this house, gawd, no one could miss it.

It was HUUUGGGE.. It even has an east-wing and west-wing. Wtf right??

Let me elaborate. In the east-wing, are the parent's side of the house. The whole wing is as big as ONE terrace house. The west-wing, are for their children. Same size. They're fucking rich I tell you. And inbetween the 2 wings, is a swimming pool. And the whole area, is fenced all around, with straw mats. It's so urban I tell you. The whole house - east-wing and west-wing and swimming pool, takes up as much space as 3 terraces. BIG terraces. Really, these people are living a life..

My dad was even telling me of this house IN Singapore, can't remember where, that cost the owner 8 million dollars. HELLO!! 8 mill! Shit.

Now I really wish I were rich. No, not to have big houses, tho that'll be cool, but to live life to its fullest. And don't give me the crap that we can live our lives to the fullest even if we're not rich. It's bullshit. C'mon. I'm broke mostly all the time, and I know being broke sucks. You can't pay for anything, 'coz duh, you're broke. Everything involves money. That's the place we live in folks. One gawd-damned money-makes-the-world-go-round shithole. And all we can do is try to make the best of it.

I don't quite understand this saying. "If life gives you lemons, make lemonade." Firstly, to make lemonade, you need more than lemons. If not, all you'll get is lemon juice. I know I know, it means, to make the best of a situation. But whatver.. Seriously, good things don't come to good people. They go to people who are mean and ruthless, and/or sometimes put on a "goody" outlook. Life's just unfair sometimes. But I am thankful about my situation. I can't do everything I wanted to do, but I have the basics - the essentials. God has really blessed me. And my dad esp. With our situation, we'd get through. And I'm glad.

Don't be fooled by my pessimism. This is just where I let it all out. Good or bad. But mostly bad.

HAPPY FATHERS' DAY!!

My dad and bro came back at around 2am this morning from KL. They went to the Sepang race track to watch Ferraris, Lambos, Celicas(...), etc, fight out in a 58 lap race. My dad had a great time. He was really happy I tell you. To be at an official F1 track was really awesome. My bro really scored points with that.

We all skipped Church today. All of us couldn't wake up. My dad woke up at 7am tho, but he forgot all about Church, and by the time he noticed the time, Church had already started. So we didn't go to Church. And by 2pm, I was up. My sis just got up too, and my mom was in the living room watching tv. My bro was in his room - asleep or not, I wouldn't know. And my dad went to take a nap. So we decided to celebrate Fathers' day with a nice family dinner instead.

My mom was on super-nag mode. The whole night was supposed to be a "dad-appreciation" day, but nooo, my mom and bro couldn't stop arguing. My brother can be quite mean sometimes, and this time, he really made my mom feel left out. So the whole night, I made sure I was thoroughly enjoying my dinner, having decent conversations with my dad, bro and sis, and making sure my mom didn't feel left out.

My dad loves this seafood restaurant at Kallang called Palm Beach. It's a familiar place to all of us. We'd at least go there twice a year. But my mom hates the place. But it's Fathers' day, so we were going to go to wherever my dad chooses to go. I mean, we did go to my mom's choice on Mothers' day, so all's fair right? My mom can be quite inconsiderate sometimes. She likes things done her way, it's just the way she is.

In the end, we did go, and my mom did the ordering. She ordered our usual, so we had no arguments there. But the service was slow. After almost an hour waiting outside the restaurant, we waited another 1/2 hour to get our first dish. My mom was complaining as usual, and that was pissing my brother off. She kept pestering the waitress about the fried rice. She wanted it to come before the food did, and the crab last. But it wasn't the waitress's fault. She wrote on the order list "xian" (first, in Chinese), but it's not her fault the chefs ignored it. So again, my mom went to grumpy mode. I was just happy to be eating all my favourite foods.

I felt really awkward when my dad and sis left the table to go put more parking coupons in the car. It meant I was left at the table, inbetween my bro on my left and my mom on my right. And at any time, any one of them might explode. But no, it was quiet. Too quiet. Very awkwardly quiet. So I started talking with my bro, after that, I talked to my mom, and this order repeated itself till my dad and sis came back. I love talking to both of them when they're in good moods, so I made sure that while I'm talking to any one of them, I didn't cross conversations. Meaning, while I'm talking with my bro, I make sure the topic's done, then open a new topic with my mom. That way, they won't talk to each other, and that's good 'coz everytime they talk, it turns into an argument. So you see my dilemma here.. I'm just glad I survived.

I hate conflicts, I really do. And I hate it when someone feels left out, 'coz I know that feeling. So when my dad, bro and sis went to take a look at some furniture on the 2nd floor of the shopping complex, I stayed on the first with my mom. The escalators weren't working, and she didn't want to climb.

At the end of the night, all was well. After passing through the main door, everyone headed to their rooms. 'Cept for me. I played and fed my hamsters.

Speedy (my hamster) was humping Fatty (also my hamster) again (I really should change their names). 8 consecutive times. I counted. Then he left, then came back for one more. Gross.

No wonder Fatty always picks fights with him. Speedy always humps him on his head. Eeeww..*shudder*.. Gross.

I've really grown attached to those little buggers. They're entertaining I tell you. It's hard to imagine, but they really are. I would record them, but I don't have a camcorder, so yea.

I have work tomorrow. Bummer. I so wanted to cancel and go tanning with Sara instead, but can't. R-E-S-P-O-N-S-I-B-I-L-I-T-I-E-S. Gawd, I hate that word.

This China guy instant msged me via MSN and I couldn't understand a whole lot of the "conversation". It's really hardly a conversation when I'm the one going "huh?" and "wat?" all the time. Plus, I think he got irritated afterawhile that he started scolding me in Chinese. At least I think he was scolding me. *shrugs*

Speaking of Chinese. Dearest Sara saw Edison Chen outside of Grand Copthorne Hotel on Wednesday night. She then got Maddie and I, and we followed her to where she saw him, but by the time we got there, he was gone. Shucks, I wanted to see if he was as cute as they say, but I guess now I'll never know. Sara's such a laugh I tell you. She kept complaining that he was wearing berms. What's wrong right? Apparently she didn't expect him to wear berms in public and all. Sigh, Sara sara...

'RIDDICK' is not half bad. Van Deisel is Mr Cool mann... But it's so weird sometimes, to hear that low voice coming from him. Oh, and the female lead "Jac/Kiera" was a girl from the 'Angel' series. She was the girl who could generate electricity through her hands. But in the movie, she's "Riddick"'s younger "sister". Overall, the movie's not bad. I was quite pleased. I actually regretted buying a ticket to a sci-fi spacey-kinda movie, but it all turned out fine. Not bad, really. I heard 'Undead' was a bummer tho. Sid told me that almost half the cinema left half an hour thru the show, including herself. I think I'll pass on that too.

I've read somewhere that there'd be a Hollywood version to 'Ju-On' coming out soon, called "The Grudge". I think Sarah Michelle Gellar (Buffy) and Jason Behr (Roswell) star in it. I can't wait.

I absolutely love M&Ms Almonds. But brace yourselves... M&Ms have gone B&W. Yes ladies and gents, BLACK AND WHITE M&Ms!! They either come in plain or peanut. And the M&Ms freak that I am, I bought both. I shall pig out on the weekend, but for now, they're safe in their packaging, awaiting for their time...

CDS I want to get:

Our Lady Peace
Incubus
Avril Lavigne (hey, she has talent!)
Allister (yes, I still haven't gotten it)
Finch (ditto)
Yellowcard ('coz my old one's gone)

Until I get money, these cds will be but a reach from me. Sian..

I managed to get on the dance floor last night, unlike last wed. But it's crazy I tell you. People right left and center.

Doesn't matter, I got to see the rest of the girls last night. Haven't seen them in so damn long I tell you. It was just...nice.

I really have a problem recognising people I tell you. Twice last night, when someone called my name, I had to take a moment (or two) to stop and think who that person was, before realising that I actually know the person. I feel kinda bad in a way, 'coz it showed in my facial expression that, for that one moment, I really did not know who I was looking at. No, it's not my brain slowing down. It's my memory. It's really going kaput.

It's like a laptop filled with tons of info (like movies, songs, videos). When you try to open something, it takes some time before it can. Like my brain, it's filled with (I admit) alot of useless info, and when it tries to recall a memory, it takes a few moments. I really need to defrag.

School's re-opening soon. Can't wait! No really!

First day's gonna be a pain in my back tho. I'm talking about the books I have to buy and bring home. Hopefully, (*cross fingers*) my dad can pick me up with that whole load, so I don't have to take the bus, heh.

I feel like eating something. It's dinner time.

To everyone who buys their imported cds from Borders. The prices have gone up. From the usual $20.95 to $28.95. Steep huh. Now how am I going to get my new Yellowcard cd? Sigh, Syaz, why did ya lose it???

I haven't been getting much sleep for 2 days since Saturday.

My fault really. I've been on 'The O.C' marathon, then moving onto 'Friends'. But no, I haven't finished the whole OC season yet. I'll have to wait till my bro downloads the rest soon.

Hey, does anyone know when school starts? I know for a fact that NYP has already started its school semester, so when's NP's? Let me know when ya'll know k?

I hate doing this every end of the school hols. I'd end up back in square ONE, blur and disorientated for the upcoming school year. Fuck la.

I miss school tho. And if you read my ol' entries, around the end of the holidays, I always look forward to school. But then bitch about it when it comes around. What ever am I going to do when I finish poly.

OH SHIT! I think I have an interview tomorrow afternoon! Holy shit. Damn..

Alright, I need to prepare for tomorrow now. Damnit! I can't believe I forgot!! I so need to bring my organiser out more often. It's b'coz of times like these that I bought one in the first place, and now I don't even use it. Great.

Ciao!

'The O.C' rocks. I managed to watch this week's episode, the one I missed 'coz I was at PotBlack. And I've spent 2 hours plus watching 3 episodes - 8, 9 & 10. Now I'm going to take a snack break, watch a little tv, and then later get back to my 'O.C' marathon. Sigh, the life.

I really suck at pool. Sid and I took half an hour to finish one game. ONE GAME!!! Sigh, how pathetic. And we didn't even finish it.

Bumped into Melv at Borders. Haha, poor NS boye, had to get MC just to get one day off to go out with his friends. Mann, wonder how Paul's doing.

I'm broke once again. Just 2 weeks from getting my pay, it's all gone now. I got $200 for last month. Supposed to get $300 but my manager miscounted the days I've worked for, so it's on my next pay check. So anyway, $50 goes into my SAYE (Save-As-You-Earn) account, and the rest of the $150 has disappeared. $70 on my dress from yesterday, $25 on shoes I bought last week, $5 on a scented candle from British India, and.. and.. Okay, basically, $100 is accounted for. The rest of the $50.. Ok, it makes sense now. I used that 50 on food, entertainment, etc. Damn. I really spend like nobody's business boye. I really shouldn't have bought that damn dress.

All I've got left is, $1.65 in my purse (all in coins), $6.## in my POSB account, and some coins in my "piggy bank". Damn.

Looks like no entertainment for the next few days folks. No worries for me, 'coz I've got work on Saturday, and the whole season of 'The O.C' on my bro's comp to watch, heh.

Have ya'll tried the new super long escalator at Wisma Atria?? Mannn, it's like the beginning of a roller coaster ride. It goes damn high up I tell you. I found myself gripping to the handbar while ascending to the 4th floor. And I used to live on the 23rd storey!! Mann, you guys HAVE to try it. I've already gone on it twice today. Haha, I'm sounding like a lil' kid right about now - getting so damn excited over a silly-ol' escalator. But hey, it's something new in town. What can I say? It IS exciting!

'Neways, gotta get up for web enrollment later. 11am, then at 12, Sid's coming over to play tennis. Ha! Tennis! I haven't played that in 'bt a year. I'll probably suck at it now. All rusty and shit.

Right-O! Cheerio! Tut tut!

It was my friend's birthday yesterday, and he had a miserable time the whole day. Poor guy, he went to Zouk but planned to leave straight after 'coz he thought it'd suck. Then he told me this, "i was sooo sure zouk would have sucked. luckily you were there.." and before that, "thanks for making my day...". Awww... So sweet yea??

I'm so glad I made a difference in someone's day today. It's just so fulfilling. Plus, I'm glad he got to enjoy at least a few hours of his birthday. Everyone deserves to be happy on their birthday. It's only right.

Oooh... I'm really terrified now.

Did you not get what I said?? I'm not getting all worked up. C'mon, read my entry again. Or are you that dumb to understand, really.

I was agreeing with you. I KNOW I'm not photogenic, and I CAN'T see myself on ads. How clear is that? Still don't get it? Go take up classes on E-N-G-L-I-S-H.

AND, I really DO think you're the same person. Don't give me the "more than 1 person agree to my point" crap. It's just (maybe) 2 people agreeing to it. Okay, make that three, counting me. Happy? I heard you loud and clear Mr. "student". And I AM AGREEING TO YOU. So, YOU don't get worked up ok?

I have to admit tho, I am amused. I've never gotten hate mail before. It's exciting!!

Speaking of hate mail... OMG, it's so weird.. I bumped into this girl in Zouk who used to bully me back in Secondary school. She kept on apologising for it just now. But I told her it was alright. I'm over it, and I'm glad that at least she knows what she'd done. I really am. She has this "accent" now tho, ha, weird.

Phuture was packed as usual. So packed in fact, that I didn't even make it to the dance floor. Argh, fuck it. Doesn't matter. I ended up chilling with peeps at wine bar. I got some free drinks today too. 1 Lambo from my brudda Jere, and 2 Lychee martinis from Andrew who's birthday just passed. Lychee martinis are delish btw. Super yummy. But anyways, you guys HAVE to try "apple shooters". They're good too. Those were the only things I paid for tonight. I managed to get to a certain level of high tonight, so all's good. I'm trying to sober up now, before showering.

Sid was damn funny today. We saw Mark Zee. Y'know, the guy from CLEO Bachelors and 'Eye for a Guy'. We were at the entrance of Phuture, and probably a metre away from him, when Sid called out his name. It was obvious it came from her, esp when she started to pretend looking everywhere else but his way. Duh. Then she finally asked him where some other guy was. They talked but their conversation didn't last long. I loved hearing his accent tho, it was just so "awww..". I did wonder where his gf was tho. She was nowhere to be seen. Hmm...

I'm having trouble sobering up. Everything's a little blurry right now. Ha, what's new? My eyesight's bad enough, and this highness isn't helping. Argh, fuck it, it'll fade off soon.

Later.

To the anti-Amandas on my tag board:

First off, why are you telling me stuff I already know? It's really sad that after all this reading of my blog, you still don't get it. I'm M-E-D-I-O-C-R-E and have very very VERY low self esteem. So yea, sure, say what you want, 'coz I've said it to myself a million and one times. Ask my friends.

I know I'm not photogenic, that's why I don't take photos too often. And I can't imagine myself on ads as well. I really can't. And I don't think I'm downright UGH-ly, but like I said - I'm mediocre. I'm comfortable with who I am. I know how I look like, and I don't think otherwise. I appeal to some and don't to others. It's personal preference really.

Another thing, I know you're the same person who posted 2 tags with 2 diff "anonymous" names. Don't be stupid. At least wait awhile to post the 2nd one to make it at LEAST a lil' believable!

Also, get some balls and put your real name. Instead of some lame-o nickname like "student" or "anonymous". Gawd, really, it's so passe. And cowardly.

But thanks for visiting!

Wanted to tan today, but got up too late. It was freakin hot today tho, damn.

I ended up spending the day with my dad and lil' sis. We bought one of those foam tube-like floaty thingies for swimming. It's just this long tube that floats. It's fun shit I tell you.

My sis kept bugging me to go swimming when we got back, but I didn't want to. SHE wanted to test out our new swimming thingamajig.. I didn't want to step into cold water on a cool day. So in the end, we didn't go.

I should be sleeping now. Got work tomorrow. Argh, I shouldn't have agreed to work. I've got other things to do. Pfft, Oook, I know I'd end up not doing what I needed to do, but hey, it's the thought. Right?

I was watching 'Harry Potter' - this first installment, and during the commercials, I saw a few familiar faces.

Aloe v drink ad: Joycelyn (red fringed girl) and one other guy I met twice, but still can't remember his name, tho he remembers mine.

Canon ad - beach volleyball: Wayne's girlfriend - Angela, Desmond (GP's friend) and Sebastian (one of CLEO's bachelors 2004 finalists). Basically all the three that were in the car.

New starhub ad: Matthews. There were alot of different scenes, but I managed to spot him in the arcade scene.

All this, one after another. Wtf. And now my mom wants me to do all these kinda tv ads, rather than modelling. Argh, whatever. It does pay more, I know, but I can't stand the fact that my mom will go around telling everyone she meets about it. "Hey! My daughter's in this ad." yada yada yada... Major embarassment.

Plus, I'm just getting used to being in front of a camera. But to act in a commercial? That'll take a little more time for me to adjust. Hopefully I'll get paid alot for standing waaay in the back with the other extras. I'm tall, you'd still be able to see the top of my head at least.

Mann, I really have to deal with this self-conciousness. It's really eating me. I just can't help feeling mediocre sometimes. 'Coz I really think I am. Mediocre Amanda.

My mom's really getting to me.

Mom: Is her dining table glass?
Alli: Yes.
Mom: Is it?
Alli: Yes.
Mom: Is it?
Alli: Yes.
Mom: Her dining table's made of glass?

I should get a recorder.

Typical conversation with my mom:

Mom: How was it?
Me: I didn't try it.
Mom: Did you try the fried rice?
Me: Mom, I just said, no.
Mom: How was it?
Me: (...)

We just have this great understanding towards one another. She doesn't understand, and neither do I. We understand that. Well, I do.

Sometimes I don't even know why I talk to her. She doesn't listen. Either that, or she's deaf. Ha! So that's where I inherited the deafness from..

I watched the news just now, and saw some of the contestants who tried out for the Singapore Idol. It's ridiculous I tell you. So many people thinking they can actually sing. I think Singaporeans are getting as naive as the Americans are. There were these 2 esp, one guy and one girl. They both don't know each other, but the newscaster interviewed them. We even got to see them audition. The girl was not bad, not that spectacular either, but I guess she'll have to do. The guy, totally sucked. But in the end, both got through to the next round. Wow, what standards!

Mann..I can't wait to see who wins the damn thing. And to go against the other countries' idols in 'World Idol'. Damn, that'll be something worth watching. Burn Singapore Idol, burrrn.

I was bored, so I cut my fringe again. I cut it too short tho. It's now just the length under my eyes. I was going for what I had the first time I trimmed my fringe. But I wasn't in my artistic mood to visualise what I wanted it to look like, so it's now exactly what I didn't want it to look like. Hard to explain. Ya'll just have to see it when you see me. Just don't giev em too much of a hard time 'bt it k? At least it's a change. I soo need a change. I'm bored outa my mind.

I'm miserable. And I'm not even exaggerating. One look at me and you can tell. My dad could even read me last night. This afternoon he even asked, "Why did you look so sian?" sian = bored btw, to all those unfamiliar to the term. So yea, it shows. I need to destress and to relax.

Where's that spa treatment when you need it??

My class reunion was a bummer. I didn't enjoy myself at all. I mean, yea, I did get to catch up with some people, but it was like Secondary school all over again. I felt so out of place with some of 'em.

I shouldn't have agreed to this and just have gone for Sara's party. It's too late now.

I did all the prep, with some help from my dad of course. My dad was great. He bought the charcoal and brought down all the BBQ equip; like tongs, wire gauze, satay bbqer, etc from storage, and he even picked up the satay all the way from Tanjong Katong! Mind you, I stay in the North West. Tanjong Katong's in the East. We went to buy the food in the morning and I spent the whole afternoon prepping for tonight. Cutting veggies, cooking the corn, getting ready all the stuff to bring down to the pits, etc. My dad was a real big help. I mean, not only did he get the charcoal the day before, he also went with me to buy all the food and helped me bring it home. How great is that? He even bought the ice on his way back from an appointment with clients. I really have an awesome dad I tell you.

At the end of the night, he came down and helped me put out the hot coals, and helped us carry the rest of the stuff back home. My bro, his gf, and my lil' sis helped put everything away when we brought everything back home. I was actually going to do all that when I got back from sending those people off, but it was all done by the time I got back. I really appreciated that. I don't know why, but I was completely miserable coming home. My ex-classmates are playing pool right now. They invited me just as they were leaving, but I declined. Great peeps huh...

I don't know why I comply to this all the time. I should have never agreed to doing this shit. I just thought things would change. Evidently not.

I went Zouking, yes, again.

Wasn't quite as fun as the week before. Maybe 'coz the music was sucky and the crowd was over hauled. I did see quite a number of familiar faces around, so that's a plus. Even met the Manager of Zouk who gave Madd, Sara, Di, and I his cards, though I don't quite know what to do with it. He said something about calling him if there's any trouble? I don't know. I become extra deaf after coming out of a club.

I went drinking after clubbing. Yea I know, who drinks after clubbing. Well, my friend does, and we went over to his place to just drink and chill. I only got home at around 8am.

I was supposed to meet Nat for tanning today, but due to the utter exhaustion I felt, I cancelled. Sorry Nat! I wasn't even sure if the weather was at all sufficient for a good tan. I was konked out on my bed.

My dad woke me up at around 2pm for lunch, but I didn't get to eat it till 7 plus.

Tomorrow's my class reunion. I can't wait for BBQ-ed food. Chicken wings, sausages, corn, etc. Of course I can't wait to see my ex-classmates too, but BBQ food is hard to come by, esp, when it's an occasional thing. And it being so troublesome and all.

Note to self: Don't try too hard, and be normal to your extend. That way, you won't have too many expectations and you know it's 'coz you're you. (If ya'll don't get it, don't worry. It's more for me to read and remember.)

I loved 'Under The Tuscan Sun'. It was inspiring.

The script's well written, and the actress in the lead role was splendid. I loved the whole movie. Don't be fooled by its title. Imagine it as a title of a good book, 'coz it is exactly that, 'cept for the not being a book part.

It's a sweet tale, more to the liking of chick-flick goers, but this is one movie, I thoroughly enjoyed. There's even a happy ending. Maybe that's why I like this movie so much. I'm a sucker for happy endings.

Time just doesn't exist to me anymore. Like, I didn't know today's Vesak day. Btw, Happy Vesak Day. Though I don't really know what it's for. Buddhists??

I just realised that I'm the one who's supposed to plan for my class reunion's BBQ this coming friday. And I've just got all the info together. All the invites had already been done by the ex-monitor and monitoress, so all I have the do is the food. Great.

I hate being the organiser for this kinda thing. It's especially annoying if it's at my place, and for this situation, it is. It's like, first, everyone smses me for my address. And it's hard to explain how to get to my place 'coz the road itself isn't where the entrance is. Okay, it is, but it's the side entrance where people usually enter from. I live in a condo btw. So yea, it's kinda useless to give them the road name, but they need it anyway, to get here. So basically, I'm picking up some of 'em from Ngee Ann's bus stop then the rest of 'em will try to find their way here on their own. Argh...my phone bill's gonna sky rocket through the roof. And my dad will not be happy.

The upside? I'll be seeing the people I've hoped to see. Most of the people I don't wanna see aren't going, so that's good. But some of whom I DID want to see aren't coming as well. I guess it's better than nothing yea?

I feel as though, these few days, I've been writing in circles. I don't know what's up with me. I haven't written a decent poem in months. And I think my soul's dying.

Can a soul die in a living human body?